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Friday, February 13, 2015

You're Sherry Henry!

So I am still trying to figure out a good schedule to update this thing. Since I don't have Pdays, I am still trying to find where blogging fits into my land of eternal Pdays which I am now privileged to enjoy.  I love my mission.

Anyways, this last week was pretty rough for me.  Granted, it was still a wonderful week and I will be the last person to say that I don't have an extremely blessed life, but we all still have hard times.  It was one of those weeks where you just feel the pressure, stress, and sadness squeezing into you.  You want to escape it, and often you will yourself to, but it still is there and catches you every now and then.  You're not quite sure why, but you just find yourself being sad, or irritable, etc.

Last night I was really upset at myself for feeling so upset, and so in my prayer I asked Heavenly Father why in the world I feel so emotionally unstable and unhappy?  I was so confused, and I just wanted to know what was wrong, what in the world was bothering?

I started my period today.  Isn't it so funny how Heavenly Father answers our prayers?

I love walking home from class.  I feel like I live the perfect distance from campus, it is about a 20 or so minute walk.  It just gives me the best listening-to-music-thinking-time.  As I was walking home today I was thinking about just life, where I am, where I have been.  You know, the past, future, present, all of those things that usually come to your mind when you are pondering.

It's been a strange adjustment coming home from the mission.  I think a lot of people understand what I mean.  It's just a transition, you know?  Like every other transition of your life, it throws you off and makes you have to re-calibrate some things, or discover things that don't need calibrated and ought to stay the same.  So as I was walking home, this sort of topic was really on my mind.

I then was reminded of when I was in high school and something people would often say to me.  They would say, "You can do it, you're Sherry Henry!"  or, "Come on, you're Sherry Henry!"  I remember I would get a little bugged sometimes and think, "You don't understand, I am just me, I am just that.  Just Sherry Henry."

But as time has started to move forward, I realized how flattered I was that people thought so highly of me as to use my name in such a way.  People were telling me that Sherry Henry, she is strong and she can do things if she wants to.  That Sherry Henry is nice and that she cares about others.  That she is Sherry Henry, and that makes her special because she is herself.

Man, I feel so blessed.  I have the best friends in the world.

So, on this walk, I then decided in my head that, you know what?  I am Sherry Henry!  I am me, and I can do wonderful things because I am who I am.  I can't do what that person is supposed to do, that's true.  I can't do this thing in her way or that thing in his way, but I can do my thing in my way.  And that is wonderful. I have gifts that God has given to me, and with those gifts I can impact the world in my own sphere.  It's like that saying, "No one can do everything, but everyone can do something."  So I hope to do that something!  I hope to be the person I am supposed to be, because she is exactly the right person for me to be!

Anyways, I suppose that was just on my mind today.  We are all so special.  We are all so individual and unique and fantastic!  I have not met a bad person in my entire life.  Maybe you have, but I haven't.  Everyone is wonderful.

Jeder ist großartig.

I miss my mission so much.  But I am so grateful for a life that moves forward and gives us new chances and new challenges.  How wonderful is it to know that there is always a new day tomorrow.  We can always start over and we can always change.  I love that. I love life.  Life is fantastic, we are so blessed to be alive.

I love you all!


Tuesday, February 3, 2015

I'm back!

Well, I have been debating on whether or not I want to do this for a while...get back to this whole blogging thing I mean.  After an 18 month break and weekly mission emails, I was a little blogged out.  Didn't catch the mission blog?  All of the cool stuff is here if you want to check it out...

Yeah, I think the above photo explains it all.  It was awesome.  The best 18 months of my life.

So now the real question is:  What next?

I suppose that is what I am going to find out.  I mean, the real journey starts now, right?  It is one thing to make the most out of 18 months, but it is a total other ball game to make the most out of the rest of your life.

So here I am.  I'm back!  And I've decided that, just as I've been able to share my mission with y'all, I want to share my life with y'all.
*Funny side note.  I've started saying y'all since I learned German because there is a form of you that is the equivilent to y'all.  So it just seems to make sense in English now.  I hope all of my texan friends are proud!*

Anyways, maybe you'll care to read this thing, and maybe not.  Don't worry, I won't be offended if you don't.  I will at least try to post pictures because let's be honest, we always would rather look at the pictures.

Well, I've got to go.  A friend and I are performing for a retirement home valentine's day party next week and we need to practice.  Maybe I will take some pictures and share with you all how it went.  Because that's what bloggers do, right?


Tuesday, December 4, 2012

I do love my flowers

The Tulip and The Bulb

A tulip once was in the ground, and next to it a bulb.
Day by day the tulip talked and to the bulb it told;

"Oh woe is us my little one!  The weather is so dry!
And there, you see the predators, who will bite our leaves Oh my!
When I was but a bulb the world was so much better
The insects all had standards and we didn't have such weather!
But now you see, our world must end, the Gardener is coming.
Oh, alas, he's coming now!  Don't you hear that humming?"

But as the Tulip was blabbering useless care,
the bulb decided to work on growing roots down there.
He also started speaking to insects in the dirt
and when he sprouted, realized, that insects don't try to hurt!
So he turned to that poor tulip who for weeks had been woeing on,
and he opened his mouth to tell her she had told herself a con.

"Oh you strong and wise grown tulip, you think the world is bad.
But I don't get how you've come to miss that we really ought be glad!
You call these insects pests trying to cause us pain,
but you have you tried to talk to them?  Their knowledge will bring you gain!
And how lucky are we our roots must be in the earth so deep.
For when a strong breeze hits us, we most certainly upright shall keep!
So there is so much time ahead to grow more beautiful and tall,
and our gardener would never all this majesty stall!"

But the older one wouldn't hear it, she just knew they would all die.
So she kept on despising her life.
 Ah, this makes me sigh.

And then I look to you, dear Elders, to whom I always admire.
I just start to get disappointed you think the world must end in fire.
You silly goose, who is just stocking up on pride,
go out and befriend enemies instead of hiding away inside!

Thursday, November 29, 2012

12 Things I Have Learned From Yoga

This semester I took a Yoga course because it is a Pre-Requisite for the BFA in Acting Track which until recently was my intended major.  This class has taught me so many lessons, it's ridiculous.  Sorry this post is a little lengthy but I promise it's real honest and hopefully good.  Oh and sorry, I'm sure my grammar is horrible.  I'm sort of lazy when it comes to that.

My 12 Lessons:

1.       When it’s hard, it’s good for you.  When we started with Ben, our class definitely changed vibes.  Instead of just the relaxing yoga we did with Dave, my body would now tremor in poses and I would have such a hard time.  There were times where I wanted to quit because it was hard.  But instead of giving up, because I knew my body wasn't in pain or anything, I just breathed through the difficulty.  This did far more good than just going into child’s pose would have done because it built strength and taught me to breathe through the difficulty.  After doing this all semester, I came to enjoy the harder poses because after a harder set, I felt good.  I felt best, actually, when were finished with a class and my body had worked hard because so much tension was gone.

2.       Tension is real.  Before this semester I had never even been introduced to the concept of tension.  It sounds so cliché, but our body really does hold in the troubles and worries that we don’t let out.  I came into this semester as someone who didn't trust others, who didn't open up, and who just held her breath and waited for the storm to pass.  But holding your breath and waiting until the next morning doesn't fix the problem, it just lets you keep going.  You keep that energy inside your body and it’s tangible and physical.  Tension is so real, it’s almost scary that so many people are unaware of it.  Their lives could be so much better if they let themselves deal properly with the problems that they've stored in their body.

3.       Yoga can be done any time anywhere.  I work every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday night from 8 to midnight at a desk job and it can get really boring and mundane.  I’m here by myself and sometimes I’ll have literally an hour stretch of no one coming in.  It’s really easy to let myself sit around and waste time, but then I feel sort of yucky afterwards.  So I started doing yoga at my job.  Just a sun salutation cycle or two, nothing fancy and definitely nothing super grueling.  But my body loves it and starts to crave it.  Yoga is really a gift that you can take with you anywhere if you need a quick fix.  It makes you feel good any time and anywhere.

4.       It’s okay to go into child’s pose.  Another thing that I learned from yoga is that you just can’t compare yourself because that doesn't make you feel good.  There are times where my arms are shaking, but I see people around me able to do the pose and I want to keep going.  After all, I’ll look like a wimp if I’m the only one to go down.  But eventually I learned that people have weaknesses and strengths in every pose and you can’t compare yourself because your body is so unique and different than others.  So if you feel like you need to, just go into child’s pose.  Yoga is about YOU and YOUR body, not the pose, not the instructor, not your class mates.  It’s a time to listen to your specific needs and if one of those is to drop down and relax in child’s pose then do it.

5.       Everyone is human.  One of the greatest lessons I learned was with our exercise where a class member stood in front and we watched as they were opening up in front of us.  I never realized how mortal and weak we all are.  Sitting there and watching even the strongest and most intimidating people in our class open up and have insecurities, fears, and turmoil was the most beautiful thing I could ever imagine.  It must be how God loves us so much, he sees how pure and troubled we really are.  I don’t think I can ever look at a human being the same way again, and I mean that 100%.  My perception of others and my love for them has been completely altered and I am so thankful! 

6.       You are enough.  I love that secret that’s not a secret.  Ben is such a great instructor because he sees that we are enough and great, and he also sees that we ignore that sometimes.  He’s up there looking at a Child of God and you can just tell that he knows they are enough even when the student doesn't.  I don’t know why it’s such a hard concept for us to grasp for ourselves; the fact that we are good enough.  God loves us with an infinite love, and yet we don’t believe it because we’re not perfect.  Even though God told us that we won’t be perfect.  But our bodies are enough, our spirituality is enough, our acting is enough, our grades are enough, we really are enough.

7.       We cheat ourselves by not looking into another’s eyes, and by not opening up.  This ties in with number 5 a little bit.  With our exercise of the student in front of the class, I really noticed how much love can travel between people when both parties let themselves be open.  We have so many blocks that we put up in everyday life trying to hide this beautiful and complicated person inside.  Why do we do it?  We are really hurting ourselves because there is so much love to gain and so much love to give.  We’re such scardy cats in a way, but there’s no reason to be afraid because like I said before, everyone is human and everyone is  on the same level.  Like en talked about, sure he’s our instructor but that doesn’t mean he knows more or he’s any better than any of the students.  If we could have that confidence in ourselves and that understanding with others, we’d be able to open our eyes and really know when someone is having a hard day or let other people know when we’re feeling down and be able to communicate compassion and love with even a stranger.

8.       Listen to your body.  Holy cow I am so grateful for this class!  I now do these things every day that I like to call body checks.  While I’m sitting down I’ll just look inward for a few seconds and see what parts of my body are hurting or tense.  You can really tell a lot about what’s going on in your mind, what’s causing you stress, if you just listen to your body.  I love the quote by C.S. Lewis, “You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.” But I think he’s a little off there because our soul and our body are divinely related.  The more you realize that connection, the healthier your body and your mind will be.  There’s a reason we were so excited to have bodies, because they are really the other half of us.  They are so amazing!  We owe them the opportunity to be heard and listened to.

9.       No one is looking.  This goes back to point number 4, which is that it’s okay to go into child’s pose.  But I think it’s bigger than comparing ourselves to others.  No one can tell you that you’re doing a pose wrong, or that you need to go farther into it, because only you know your body and its specific needs.  And contrary to popular belief, there is no person watching your every move making sure you do it right.  This is such a life lesson, because so often we put unnecessary pressure on ourselves to do thing that we think is the right thing because we have the notion that in someone elses’ opinion it is right…but it’s our life, it’s our pose.  No one is looking over your shoulder to see if you’re doing it right, instead of worrying about doing things wrong, we just need to listen to ourselves and do what is best.

10.   Take time to be present.  It’s amazing how letting yourself just be present in your body at least once a day can change you.  Sometimes in class or in a stressful situation Ben’s voice will come into my head, “acknowledge the thought or concern and gently send it away.”  It is possible to be absolutely 100% present in life, believe it or not.  It’s possible to sit there and not worry or concern about this thing or that.  And if you let yourself take time to do this, you’re guaranteed to feel more free and happy.  You just have to make the conscious choice to do so, especially when fall semester ends and you won’t have yoga to help you anymore.

11.   My bubble is very close.  With a couple of other students Ben talked about their personal bubble.  Some people have a large bubble that feels very inclusive and inviting.  Others have a pretty close bubble that they send you away with, but once you’re in, you’re in.  And then there’s those like me, that hold their bubble so close you can’t even realize it’s there.  You think they’re letting you in but they really aren’t, they have huge walls that you will never get through…unless they change their ways and let you.  After Ben talked about that, I realized that I don’t want to be a close-bubble sort of person, I want people to feel like they’re close to me and it be true.  There’s nothing to be ashamed of, as I said before, the world would be such a better place if we didn’t have our bubbles and we let others really see us.

12.   Be real and show people you care.  This sort of encompasses a lot of what I’ve talked about.  But, I just have to say that I’ve seen this magic of showing people you care really work as I’ve seen Ben interact with us students.  He stands there and looks at the student being totally honest and letting them know he just wants to help them.  He’s not trying to be overly sincere, he’s not trying to show off what he can do, he really just wants to help the student and take care of them.  And he does.  After he works with a student, their life really does change even if it is in the slightest degree.  When we stop worrying about if someone will believe that we care, stop worrying if they may think we have the wrong intentions  and just let ourselves truly and honestly care, we can change lives.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

A Nugget For Thought

The Wise Words of David Morgan

The other day my good friend Becky and I were spending our hour break chit chatting in the Wilkinson Center Cafeteria on BYU's campus.  We ran into David Morgan, an acting professor here, and sat down to talk to him for a bit.  We were talking about Provo and how mundane and boring it can be, sometimes you just want to leave.  I proceeded to add, "but of course, the mountains are beautiful."  David then said something that throughout the day stuck with me,

"Yes, if you remember to look at them."

How true is that? 

It's been a while

Look Up

We are all sad, no listen, it's true.
To be sad doesn't mean you can't be happy too.
But, life is hard, it brings us down,
every single one.
Oh, do not fear, that's why God gave
to all of us the sun!

I definitely didn't write little poems to sound good or even share.  It's just sometimes you have thoughts and emotions going through your head while you're sitting in a boring lecture or on your couch and you've got to get them out somehow.  I think that's one of the beauties of words, you can string them together into a rhythm that helps to share the way your emotions or thoughts feel.  A lot of time emotions don't flow out of us freely, we're confused and our judgment toward them is choppy.  So the way we express them comes out choppy as well.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Be a tortoise

My New Testament professor shared a great quote:

"You will move faster if you hurry less."

Think on that one.  No, like seriously; stop hurrying around, sit, take a breath, and let yourself think about it.